Hello Reader.
I'm not writing a new chapter this time, sorry. I had a few more plans for my characters than made it to the page, but I hit a mental stopping point. Tonight, I think I figured out why. I sat and let my mind wander, intentionally and with some difficulty keeping my phone in my pocket while I smoked on my front porch. After everyone else in the house is asleep my mind goes to creative efforts if I don't have any occupation for the evening. I thought about the story I've begun here, and each time I thought about one of the chapters, I wanted to go back and change things. This is not unusual, as each chapter has been prodded a few too many times to mention. Each time I read it I can't help but go in and adjust something. Tonight I was looking at the big picture though, and I have decided to reset the story from the very beginning. I'm going to go into (and ramble about) some of the changes I was thinking about. If you have read the chapters previous to this post, then feel free to add your two cents...
From the very beginning I want to establish the secondary characters more firmly. I think the people that the brothers keep around themselves will be telling of the kind of people they are and what they have sought or found in their exile. Griffin will still be alone at the beginning, after all, the notion of someone jumping out of an airlock to escape their "unavoidable" fate was the seed that spawned the idea.
Griffin - Alone. Brothers, acquaintances, and life as he knows it behind him.
Griffin is trying to escape his circumstances, and if he is successful, then even his brothers will be but a memory and he will take nothing with him into his new life. Oooooo I ned to give him something of his brothers' to take with him. A small personal memento would be good, maybe a cap or jacket, some kind of non-military wardrobe he could wear in his liberated civilian life. It could even be something not normally worn by men on his world, something of his mothers he adopts.
Lozan - Surrounded by those who must obey his command.
Sounds harsh, but he was the oldest brother, and old enough to have had his fate determined before the exile. Being sent away allowed him control and power for the first time in his life. He must appreciate the structure of the military unit, like a family in so many ways, but dictated by rules, emotion not being a large part of it. I think Lozan must have been mostly unhappy in his previous life, but not without hope. I want him to seem as if he gained freedom from the chains of his fate, but lost the hope that had made his life worth living at the same time. Maybe he was in love with the girl he was arranged to marry... I'm getting ahead of myself....
Axar - Alone, but in contact with a few close friends.
Axar seems to have struck the best balance of the three, finding a way to make a new family without forgetting what happened to his family. He might be the most bottled up though. The brother that had to fight to keep his brothers from the brink of despair after exile, and soldiered through with determined ignorance of his own feelings. He has deep unresolved anger towards his father, but buries it. Axar gained a new father figure in the military, and a new family as well. He became quickly close with them and they helped him keep himself together. The baggage that he hides from himself separates him from others at the deepest levels though, and even the closest friends would agree that there's always more going on with Axar than he says.
Secondary characters
One of the things I kept thinking about was Axar on the Asteroid base. I'm going to completely redo that whole scene. Right now the people on that rock are lifeless and it's a missed opportunity for fun. I don't even know what I'm going to write, but it is already one of my favorite things. I'm going to let the folks on the observations station get real weird. They're out there on shift for years and years at a time (and I think I'm going to make that absurd too) with very little contact from the outside world, except for the full spectrum of virtual entertainment options. Maybe the guy who delivers yearly supplies also brings the crew some illicit materials as well. Maybe some/all of the crew casually date each other in turn. Maybe one of the crew died and is hermetically sealed inside their quarters, quarantined for the deadly virus they had. Think Red Dwarf for the isolated feel and weirdness factor. As of this moment I'm thinking about 4 or 5 characters there, with at least one of them being some kind of extra strange, like a riverboat captain or a mime or someone with major neurosis. That way, when Axar arrives he'll be confornted with this full-in-the-face weirdness and have to work around it to get what information he needs. It will be so much fun to write/read too! I rewrote that chapter twice, and still don't love where it ended up. This is probably why I want to rewrite.
Also, I think it would be better to flesh out Axar's mentor before I send Axar down the rabbithole he's about to fall in. His "mission" is kinda shaky plot-wise except for a reason to get him away for Griffin's drafting. I think I'll change that up and let it be done through the mentor. Also, the kind of contact he got from his buddy was good, but I want to know the relationship through the dialogue, and I didn't accomplish that before. Man, I love what is about to happen in his story, and the improved asteroid base crew will make it all the better
Lozan's crew didn't get much of a chance to develop, but that's mostly ok with me. I just need to flesh out his XO and decide the exact nature of her and Lozan's relationship. I think they will need to share something intimate, even if it isn't romantic or sexual, which are the ideas that immediately spring to my mind. Lozan's attempted use of the military structure to distance himself from emotion is busted if he is dating a subordinate. I want her to be stone cold though (in public at least). Total hardass.
Jeffers Welm is kind of an odd fit into the roster of POV characters, but I really really want to write him for some reason. Is he the personification of the public (in opposition to the trio of space princes)? He is in awe of Lozan, but will ultimately be the one chasing Griffin across the galaxy. I need to figure out who this guy is more deeply.
Welm's inclusion makes me wonder if I should have any other POV characters that are not the brothers. I can't think of who it would be though. Maybe someone that Griffin comes across. He will make contact with a certain person who will become his companion, but not yet. Perhaps she will be a POV character. We'll see. I hardly know her yet.
I think that's about it. Or I'm getting sleepy. Either way we'll see how I feel about restarting in the morning, I'm definitely not up to it now. All this consideration has given me some other ideas about what lies ahead for the princes. This might take me a while.
I'm not writing a new chapter this time, sorry. I had a few more plans for my characters than made it to the page, but I hit a mental stopping point. Tonight, I think I figured out why. I sat and let my mind wander, intentionally and with some difficulty keeping my phone in my pocket while I smoked on my front porch. After everyone else in the house is asleep my mind goes to creative efforts if I don't have any occupation for the evening. I thought about the story I've begun here, and each time I thought about one of the chapters, I wanted to go back and change things. This is not unusual, as each chapter has been prodded a few too many times to mention. Each time I read it I can't help but go in and adjust something. Tonight I was looking at the big picture though, and I have decided to reset the story from the very beginning. I'm going to go into (and ramble about) some of the changes I was thinking about. If you have read the chapters previous to this post, then feel free to add your two cents...
From the very beginning I want to establish the secondary characters more firmly. I think the people that the brothers keep around themselves will be telling of the kind of people they are and what they have sought or found in their exile. Griffin will still be alone at the beginning, after all, the notion of someone jumping out of an airlock to escape their "unavoidable" fate was the seed that spawned the idea.
Griffin - Alone. Brothers, acquaintances, and life as he knows it behind him.
Griffin is trying to escape his circumstances, and if he is successful, then even his brothers will be but a memory and he will take nothing with him into his new life. Oooooo I ned to give him something of his brothers' to take with him. A small personal memento would be good, maybe a cap or jacket, some kind of non-military wardrobe he could wear in his liberated civilian life. It could even be something not normally worn by men on his world, something of his mothers he adopts.
Lozan - Surrounded by those who must obey his command.
Sounds harsh, but he was the oldest brother, and old enough to have had his fate determined before the exile. Being sent away allowed him control and power for the first time in his life. He must appreciate the structure of the military unit, like a family in so many ways, but dictated by rules, emotion not being a large part of it. I think Lozan must have been mostly unhappy in his previous life, but not without hope. I want him to seem as if he gained freedom from the chains of his fate, but lost the hope that had made his life worth living at the same time. Maybe he was in love with the girl he was arranged to marry... I'm getting ahead of myself....
Axar - Alone, but in contact with a few close friends.
Axar seems to have struck the best balance of the three, finding a way to make a new family without forgetting what happened to his family. He might be the most bottled up though. The brother that had to fight to keep his brothers from the brink of despair after exile, and soldiered through with determined ignorance of his own feelings. He has deep unresolved anger towards his father, but buries it. Axar gained a new father figure in the military, and a new family as well. He became quickly close with them and they helped him keep himself together. The baggage that he hides from himself separates him from others at the deepest levels though, and even the closest friends would agree that there's always more going on with Axar than he says.
Secondary characters
One of the things I kept thinking about was Axar on the Asteroid base. I'm going to completely redo that whole scene. Right now the people on that rock are lifeless and it's a missed opportunity for fun. I don't even know what I'm going to write, but it is already one of my favorite things. I'm going to let the folks on the observations station get real weird. They're out there on shift for years and years at a time (and I think I'm going to make that absurd too) with very little contact from the outside world, except for the full spectrum of virtual entertainment options. Maybe the guy who delivers yearly supplies also brings the crew some illicit materials as well. Maybe some/all of the crew casually date each other in turn. Maybe one of the crew died and is hermetically sealed inside their quarters, quarantined for the deadly virus they had. Think Red Dwarf for the isolated feel and weirdness factor. As of this moment I'm thinking about 4 or 5 characters there, with at least one of them being some kind of extra strange, like a riverboat captain or a mime or someone with major neurosis. That way, when Axar arrives he'll be confornted with this full-in-the-face weirdness and have to work around it to get what information he needs. It will be so much fun to write/read too! I rewrote that chapter twice, and still don't love where it ended up. This is probably why I want to rewrite.
Also, I think it would be better to flesh out Axar's mentor before I send Axar down the rabbithole he's about to fall in. His "mission" is kinda shaky plot-wise except for a reason to get him away for Griffin's drafting. I think I'll change that up and let it be done through the mentor. Also, the kind of contact he got from his buddy was good, but I want to know the relationship through the dialogue, and I didn't accomplish that before. Man, I love what is about to happen in his story, and the improved asteroid base crew will make it all the better
Lozan's crew didn't get much of a chance to develop, but that's mostly ok with me. I just need to flesh out his XO and decide the exact nature of her and Lozan's relationship. I think they will need to share something intimate, even if it isn't romantic or sexual, which are the ideas that immediately spring to my mind. Lozan's attempted use of the military structure to distance himself from emotion is busted if he is dating a subordinate. I want her to be stone cold though (in public at least). Total hardass.
Jeffers Welm is kind of an odd fit into the roster of POV characters, but I really really want to write him for some reason. Is he the personification of the public (in opposition to the trio of space princes)? He is in awe of Lozan, but will ultimately be the one chasing Griffin across the galaxy. I need to figure out who this guy is more deeply.
Welm's inclusion makes me wonder if I should have any other POV characters that are not the brothers. I can't think of who it would be though. Maybe someone that Griffin comes across. He will make contact with a certain person who will become his companion, but not yet. Perhaps she will be a POV character. We'll see. I hardly know her yet.
I think that's about it. Or I'm getting sleepy. Either way we'll see how I feel about restarting in the morning, I'm definitely not up to it now. All this consideration has given me some other ideas about what lies ahead for the princes. This might take me a while.
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